Two years!

• I still think that Quez is the most genuinely good hearted person I know. 
• He's also a jerk. If I don't fold the clothes, he'll do it. BUT he'll fold all of my clothes inside out. Yep. 
• We have the most fun together no matter where we are. We find some way to pick on each other and it's always hilarious.
• He won't go to bed without me. Bless his heart, he'll sleep on the couch in the living room until I'm done watching a show. 
• I can't go to sleep before him because I'd be up all night. He snores SO LOUD. 
• He hugs me and kisses my forehead and I still get all weak kneed. 
• He holds my hand everywhere we go and I love it. :) 
• Sometimes he has rough days at work but he NEVER takes it out on me and he doesn't really talk about it either. 
• That man is crazy about his family and mine. One of the many reasons why I love him. 
• I am only 28 weeks pregnant and our baby girl already has her Daddy wrapped around her tiny little fingers. He is so in love with her.
• Quez is my best friend and I'm his. We tell each other any and everything. He knows every single detail of my life and loves me anyway. 
• He went to go see the last Harry Potter movie with me and held me when I cried because it was all over. LOL!
• I'm insane and freak out over every little thing. He's like Xanax. He calms me down.
• Y'all, he prays with me and for me. I've never had that. 
• Most importantly, he loves me and I love him. 

May 6, 2011- I became his Mrs. Every single day with him is a blessing. I love you, Quez and I'm looking forward to a million more days with you. 

.....on paying off debt and cash envelopes

Debt sucks. Anyone with a pulse knows that. You may have no debt, very little debt, or you may be like us and up to your eyeballs in it.

Once we discovered that we were expecting, I felt this overwhelming desire to get us completely out of debt.  I didn't want our debt to take away from things we could do or get for our baby. This debt I'm speaking about is not a small amount. It was enough to make me want to bang my head on a desk repeatedly or kick & scream like a toddler. We're talking double digit grand.

The ONE good thing about Quez's career is that deployment or any other kind of overseas tours means a little more money for us. We decided that we were going to make the most of this bull crap, unexpected, stupid  nearly 16 month separation by paying off these costly bills.

I had heard lots of wonderful things about a man named Dave Ramsey, a financial guru. I decided to visit his website a few months back and what he had to say made a lot of sense. It was a good plan so I put that plan to action. We sat down and looked at our bank statement. We wrote down what Quez got paid, what bills came out when, and made allotments for other expenses such as gas, groceries, date night, etc. I'm the type that has to write something out to remember it. Mama Burd is a list maker for sure. Our budget gets written out every single month because a standard budget doesn't really work for our family and I am not a fan of excel or other computer programs  Different months have different expenses because of birthdays or various holidays.

So far since he's been in the desert, we have paid off our king size mattress, Walmart credit card, care credit bill, and HIS CREDIT CARD! We're both very proud of the other expenses we paid off but that credit card and care credit were the most expensive thus far. All of that combined is nearly $8,000 worth of debt that we no longer have to fret about. THANK YOU, LORD! We're using Dave Ramsey's "debt snowball" method to pay all of this junkity junk off. The concept is simple, really. You just list all of the debts that you owe and pay them off from the least amount to the biggest amount. I love Dave's 7 Baby Steps to Financial Peace. We're only on baby step #2 but we're well on our way to financial peace. Next debt to pay off is my student loans. We're crossing our fingers that we'll be done with those 3 beasts by April of next year (That's nearly $20,000! YUCK!). The only thing we'll have to conquer after that is my car payment. You don't even want to know how much we were forking out on bills each month. We've eliminated 4 in just a few months! I am so proud of Quez for being such a wonderful provider and I'm proud of me for being such a kick butt budgeter.

I am fully aware that we're blessed to be able to pay all of this off so quickly and that this isn't realistic for most people. I am incredibly grateful that my parents are letting me stay in their house relatively rent free, minus the power bill. We wouldn't be able to do this without them. Thank you, Mama & Daddy!

We've also adopted the cash envelope system as a way to save money and really concentrate on what we're spending the moolah on.*I used to use regular paper envelopes but I eventually grew tired of the million paper cuts. I ordered fabric envelopes from etsy. I ordered her basic envelopes, not the more expensive cute ones. Here's the link to the shop I ordered them from: click here. I was very much taken aback when I realized how much we were basically wasting. Yikes! The cash envelope system is where you have a certain amount of envelopes in various categories with an allotment of money in each envelope for each category. Your categories are whatever you want them to be. Ours are: Groceries, gas, gifts, household supplies, leftover money, and fun money. Quez gets paid biweekly so I budget that way. To give you an idea on how we work it out, here's the amount of cash I put in each envelope:
Groceries: $150 (I normally only spend $60-$70 per week at the store but I allow a little more money just in case I catch a good sale on something we eat a lot of).
Gas: $80 (Once again, we don't normally use this much in gas. We do have two vehicles but my only outings are grocery or baby related outings. Also remember that this is based on a 2 week period)
Gifts: $20
Household supplies: $50 (We typically purchase our paper items such as paper plates, toilet paper, and paper towels in bulk. This category also includes cleaning products, cat litter, cat food, diapers, wipes, and personal hygiene items.)
Fun Money: $40
Left Over Money: --- (We almost always have some sort of money left over. This extra amount gets put into savings.)

This system makes sure that I don't overspend. I just grab my little envelope and calculator when I head to the grocery store. I HAVE to stick to what's in my little envelope. I don't bring my debit card so that I'm not tempted to overspend. Fool proof. Go me!

**DISCLAIMER** I currently only use 3 of the envelopes since I am living at home: groceries, gas, and left over money. My budget is obviously halved since Quez is overseas. Also, NEVER leave these cash envelopes in your car or where they can be easily accessed by anyone who may enter your home. 

....on being a SAHM

When Quez and I made the decision to try to conceive, we also had to talk about finances and if I would work again or not. Once he came back from his deployment in February of 2012 he wanted us to catch up on lost time. I didn't work. I became the domestic engineer (I love that term. lol) of the Burd's nest. We knew we wanted to try to have a baby soon as well. Our reasoning behind the decision for me to stay home is that the likelihood that he'll be gone more than he's home is great. Both he and I felt like it wasn't fair to Sydney for both of us to possibly miss those milestones. This way, I can catch all of those special moments and share them with her daddy.

The cost of childcare is I N S A N E! If I were to work, I'd basically be paying for someone else to raise my child and that makes no sense. Also, with all of these crazies in the news lately biting children, drugging them, etc daycare scares the crap out of me. I get the "adult conversation" aspect of not wanting to be a SAHM but luckily, in the military world that won't be much of a problem. More mamas stay at home than work because of the ridiculous price of childcare so that makes for lots of play groups and mom's groups. Most churches in the area also have lots of things for the kiddos to do as well. 

Being a stay at home mom is feasible. It's not too big of a financial strain (for us, anyway). Since Quez is deployed and we're not paying rent, there's extra money right now. We're being very frugal (despite my sporadic purchases for my sweet girl) while he's gone. Quez and I are working hard to watch how much we spend and save as much as possible to pay off all debt. Hopefully we'll be completely debt free, minus my car payment, by May of 2014. That's around the time he'll be back in the states from his unaccompanied tour. So far we've paid off our king size mattress, care credit, and Walmart card. This month we'll pay off his credit card and then start on my student loans. Sallie Mae can kiss my rear. Seriously, the interest rates on those things are awful. We've done really well on sticking to the budget I write up each month. No debt means more money for my SJ's college fund. Babies are expensive, y'all! If you're wondering why I don't go anywhere or do much of anything, it's because we're trying to be all Dave Ramsey-ish and not have a butt load of debt. 

There are things we can cut out. I don't know if cable will be one of those since I think he may stroke if he doesn't have ESPN or other sports channels. I'm a Netflix and Hulu girl though. We'll cut down on our phone bills as well. Straight talk is a great option. Right now, I have Verizon and my phone bill is about $150. Expensive, very expensive, but I needed a reliable phone company and lots of data. My parents live out in the middle of nowhere in south Alabama and so the internet is not reliable and most other phone companies don't have cell phone towers that reach out here. Verizon is the best as far as service is concerned. 

I also save money by making a meal plan coinciding with what's on sale at the grocery store. When we actually live together (ha!), I typically spend close to $60-$70 per week on groceries depending on when we need toilet paper and hygiene items. I make my own laundry detergent and that costs MAYBE $3 a month. I do miss the "detergent smell" but this cleans just as well and is so much cheaper. I also make my own fabric softener. Once you buy a big ole jug of vinegar, the cost is 99 cents each time you have to make a new batch. Each batch is 4 quarts (I think) and you only use a couple of tablespoons per load so it lasts forever.

I'm excited to spend all my time with my angel girl. :)  

BIG news!

There's a sweet little baby growing in my belly!!!

Talk about shocked! WHEW!

Back in July, I was 3 weeks late. We spent about $100 on tests and never got a positive. My doctor finally got me in to do a beta test. The midwife called me back the next morning to say that it was negative and that she was sending over a prescription for Provera. We were absolutely devastated. We were diagnosed with "unexplained infertility" as well. Mrs. Cynthia (my midwife) told me that if I wasn't pregnant by the end of the summer, to make an appoinment to see Dr. T again. Summer came and went and in came October. I was feeling very discouraged. We had even contacted an adoption agency to hopefully begin that process sometime soon. I made an appointment for October 29 to undergo all sorts of testing. Something in me knew that I needed to cancel it, so I did. I wanted to give myself one more month. By the grace of God, we conceived the good ole fashioned way in November! :) :) :) :) :) :)

I was supposed to start my period on December 2nd. When it was a no show, I had the mindset that it was going to be the same thing that happened to me in July. I was too scared to test. I had a regular lady business exam appointment for Dec 13 and I knew that they'd do a routine pregnancy test on me anyway so we discussed just waiting until then. Quez and I knew that getting our hopes up was dangerous. 3:30 am on December 6th, while Quez was knocked out, I couldn't take it anymore. I threw on my clothes and headed to Walmart. He had no idea I was even gone, lol. I came back and followed the directions for the test. As soon as my pee hit the test strip and before I could even sit the test down flat, it was SUPER positive. I immediately began shaking and my heart was racing. I ran into our bedroom and flipped on the lights. Quez was not happy about that. lol. Then he realized what I was saying. He CRIED in the kitchen later that evening after we told our family and friends. It finally hit him. Sweet tears. Made my heart melt.

Our family and friends' reactions were HILARIOUS!

I never thought I'd be able to conceive naturally. I just knew that we were going to have to fight like hell to have a baby of our own. God said differently. Thank you, Lord, for this wonderful blessing and for breathing life into my womb.

Making memories :)

Every memory we've made in the present, the ones we're making now, and the memories we'll make in the future will only strengthen this relationship. This love grows stronger every single day. Here's the the memories: past, present, and future! :)

 

 

giving credit.

My husband. My best friend. The other half that makes me whole.

The sole bread winner. The non-complainer. The one who does almost everything with a quirky and toothy grin. Whatever annoying mishap happens on the ships, stays on the ships. He never brings work related stress into our home. He prays with me. He prays for me. This man would move the moon and the stars just to make me happy. He doesn't have to. Just knowing that I get to spend the rest of my life as his wife is enough. He's more than willing to crack open his bible in a church pew with me on Sunday mornings (or any morning for that matter). The man who always kisses me gently on the cheek and says "I love you" before he heads to base every morning.

The other half of my heart. My future babies' father. The man who works so hard every single day no matter what the weather is like and still helps me with dinner dishes. The one who will sleep on the couch or loveseat in the living room when I can't sleep just because he hates not sleeping in the same room/bed with me. The head of our household and the spiritual leader of our future family. My soulmate and my forever.

He is my living and breathing dream come true. <3

everyday miracles

I woke up before the sun did this morning. Slipped on some more appropriate clothes, made a pot of coffee, and sat out on my balcony breathing in the cool & crisp fall morning air. I like to do that sometimes; look around and soak in all of God's wonder when most of the world is still tucked away in bed. That's when I feel closest to Him.

I've been doing a lot of soul-searching lately. Trying to find that thread that'll hold me together, the hope that'll see me through. Daily I am learning more and more that the more I lean on God, the better I'll feel. Everything happens in His perfect time and the way He wants anyway. I might as well, suck it up, shut it up, and let Him take the wheel. I've always "known" this but putting what you know into action can turn into quite the battle. I'm human, I make mistakes, and I was not blessed with the patience of Job.

Every day God gives me to work on my faults, share my talents, and perfect my attributes is a miracle. I was reminded of this today. So as I let each sip of this coffee warm my chilly body from the inside out, I'm going to thank Him for this beautiful day and wait for the miracle we've been praying for over the past year.